From January 2022 until present day, I have had to grow up faster than most people my age. On January 6, 2022, my father decided that he had enough. He took his own life, not thinking about the impact it would have on me and my mother. I had woken up around 6:30 that morning, hearing my mother cry, but I didn’t think too much of it because my parents had gotten into an argument the night before. After lying in bed for a while, waiting for my mother to stop crying, hoping that my parents would just talk it out, she wouldn’t stop. I went downstairs, and my heart dropped a little because my mother looked so shocked. She had told me, “Miranda, the police are here, daddy shot himself. He’s dead.” It was like a huge rock fell from my heart. I could hardly stand anymore, the thought of my father, daddy, gone forever. No more morning cuddles, someone to spill my worries onto, no more fatherly love. This was all taken away by a bullet fueled by depression.

Some would describe my father as selfless, funny, and kind. However, no one really knew how he felt inside. He kept everything bottled up until he couldn’t anymore, like the bottle had shattered into a million irreparable pieces. If only he had seen himself the way everyone else did. Losing him changed my entire life, especially when it came to money. He was the main provider for our family, and even though he had life insurance, most of it went to paying off debt. My mom works hard, but her income is not enough to pay for college for me. Since he passed, I’ve had to figure out how to help support myself while keeping up with school. I’ve worked hard to get good grades because I know scholarships are my best chance at affording college. I’ve been lucky to receive some, but it’s not enough. To help cover the rest, I started house-sitting and pet-sitting after school and on weekends. Every dollar I make goes towards my education. If we had received sufficient life insurance from my father, I wouldn’t have to worry about how to pay for college, having to work so much, and I wouldn’t be writing this essay.

This past year has been the hardest of my life, but it’s also made me stronger. Losing my dad made me more determined to push forward. I want to go to college not just for myself, but for him. He believed in the power of education, and I want to honor that by building a future where I don’t have to struggle financially like we are now. Majoring in finance, I hope to attain the knowledge for financial success, and to help others achieve that, too. With the right support, I know I can keep going and make something of myself. I’m committed to making this happen, for me, for my mom, and for my dad.

On December 8th, 2023 I answered the front door to two state troopers asking to speak with my dad. I immediately knew why they were there. As I sat in silence in my kitchen for an hour feeling numb, my dad was in the garage hearing the worst news of his life. Seeing my dad come in from the garage with tears streaming down his face, I immediately broke down into tears on the floor. My mother had jumped off the Trestle Bridge in Downingtown, PA.

My mother was diagnosed with Bipolar I as a teenager. In 2019, due to substance abuse, a cycle of manic episodes started, with the last one going on almost a year. The episodes did more and more damage to her brain as time went on. She was medically diagnosed as in psychosis three separate times. I suffered a great deal of emotional abuse from her during these episodes. It was as if my mom’s soul left her body and was replaced with something or someone else. This eventually led to me getting diagnosed with complex PTSD and generalized anxiety disorder.

I originally planned to start college in January 2024 and stayed on track with that plan even after my mom’s death. But, I soon realized I was in no state emotionally to do so. I also needed to stay home to support my younger sister and help my dad around the house, as well as get a job to sustain myself financially. After moving into the dorms and starting college this past fall I found it extremely difficult handling it all. I was having panic attacks and experiencing nightmares related to my trauma. I moved back home after 2 months and started commuting. I am now studying political science and hope to bring awareness to the mental health crisis in this country and the lack of proper care that is affordable. I hope to enact change in order to make sure no one has to suffer alone.

My mother had no life insurance, and her hospital bills that accumulated over the years all fell on my dad to pay. Because of the mounting medical bills my father had no choice but to liquidate my and my three siblings’ college savings accounts as well as his 401k. If my mom had life insurance my siblings and I wouldn’t have to go into severe debt just to go to college. My dad wouldn’t have to spend hours budgeting just to make sure we can afford groceries. My mom’s lack of life insurance has been devastating to our family financially.

With this scholarship, I hope to ease the financial burden on my family as well as allow me to get the education I need to start a life for myself that my mom would be proud of. A life that will help me drive changes so other families hopefully don’t have to go through what my family has.

My dad (diagnosed at 38) passed away from Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS) when I was 15 years old, and the lack of adequate life insurance had a profound impact on our family’s financial situation and my college plans. ALS is an expensive disease, and my family wasn’t financially prepared for the long-term care my dad needed. My dad’s illness and death left behind an overwhelming $311,000 in medical costs—an amount so staggering it makes college tuition impossible.

My dad started his career out of college making the best decisions he could with the resources he had. He secured a great job, and as part of his early financial planning, he purchased a small policy that seemed sufficient at the time. However, as his life progressed—he got married, started a family, and his career advanced—his life insurance policy remained untouched, unchanged from when he first entered the workforce. A policy that helps with burial costs does not provide financial support for a family’s long-term needs. This was a critical mistake and hit our family hard. ALS is a very costly disease that requires 24/7 caregiving, hundreds of thousands of dollars, not covered by insurance. My parents had planned responsibly for the future, but they hadn’t accounted for an illness capable of wiping out a lifetime of hard work in just a few short years.

Hindsight is 20/20, and looking back, it’s clear that having adequate life insurance would have drastically changed our reality. Instead of facing financial uncertainty on top of heartbreak, we would have had the stability, security, and peace of mind to focus on grieving and healing as a family. My mom had to make difficult decisions—downsizing, taking on extra work, and pulling from savings meant for other purposes—all while trying to support us emotionally through an unbearable situation.

My parents didn’t intend for this to happen—Dad thought he had done the right thing by securing a policy early in his career. But the unfortunate reality is that life changes, and so do the financial responsibilities that come with it. As a result, I can see how crucial it is to make sure that life insurance is regularly reviewed and updated. It’s a lesson I’ve learned the hard way, and one I will carry forward in my own life. After diagnosis, my dad wrote a book of life lessons for me and my brother. Page 145 reminds us to secure life insurance!

In light of the challenges my family has faced, I’ve taken on an active provider role. I’ve worked part-time jobs while balancing a rigorous academic schedule. I am an elite rock climber (devoting over 20 hours a week to training) on the Men’s U.S. National Development Team, with my sights set on the 2028 Olympics. I have been directly admitted to the Kelley School of Business at Indiana University—an esteemed honor—and will study Finance. This experience has taught me the importance of resilience, financial responsibility, and supporting my family during difficult times. I plan to finish well.